Speed dating

Speed dating is a formalized matchmaking process or dating system (a variant of a meeting system) whose purpose is to encourage people to meet a large number of new people. Its origins are credited to Rabbi Yaacov Deyo of Aish HaTorah, as a way to ensure that more Jewish singles met each other in large cities where they were outnumbered by non-Jews. It has been made more popular by its use on dating game shows such as Fifth Wheel and has recently become popular in the gay community. Supporters argue that speed dating saves time, as most people decide if they are romantically compatible very quickly, and first impressions are often permanent.

In the original idea of speed dating, men and women are rotated to meet each other for only eight minutes. At the end of each eight minutes, they are forced to the next round no matter how much they are enjoying the interaction (or dread the next one). At the end of the event participants submit to the organizers a list of who they would like to provide their contact information to. To maximize the number of interactions, organizers often depart from the original idea and set meeting times as low as one minute per person. If there is a match, contact information is forwarded to both parties. Contact information cannot be traded during the initial meeting, in order to reduce pressure (especially on women) to accept or reject a suitor to their face.

Organization

To ensure that no participant is left alone during a round, events always have an even number of participants, and at heterosexual events the number of male and female participants is equal.

Advantages

Proponents of speed dating cite its advantages as:

  • it allows singles to meet a large number of new people in one easy event;
  • it is especially efficient for busy professionals or those that have limited social circles;
  • it levels the playing field for men and women;
  • men do not have to play their traditional role as the aggressor - both men and women are forced to meet and interact
  • the structured interaction helps shy people to overcome their inhibitions;
  • the time limit ensures that no one is stuck talking to someone longer than they wish;
  • the matching process occurs after the event, ensuring people do not have to face rejection in person

Criticisms

Critics of speed dating claim:

  • it reinforces first impressions, which may not be reliable indicators of long-term compatibility. It has also been
  • it tends to put less extroverted subjects at a disadvantage.

Despite these criticisms, speed dating continues to grow in popularity.

Scientific Research

One study of speed dating concluded that eight minutes is more than sufficient to determine if the range of a mate's hormones, a key indicator of immunities, is complementary (different) from one's own. This is claimed by some researchers to be the key factor in the so-called "first impression", and since it is olfactory (smell-based), there is no need for two individuals considering child-raising to spend more time on first impressions, it being more important to "sniff out" other mates. This view is often rejected by critics as reducing humans to dog-like status, sniffing each other and then running off to sniff others.

Speed dating in popular culture

Speed dating was featured in the following movies and TV shows:

Hitch (2005)
The 40-Year-Old Virgin (2005)
The L Word (2005)

In a 2004 episode of Dead Like Me, "Hurry," Daisy goes speed dating to take the soul of one of the men participating.

A 2006 episode of the reality show Beauty and the Geek featured speed dating as one of the challenges faced by the 'geeks'.

An episode of Gilmore Girls featured Rory's friend Paris attempting speed dating after the death of her professor boyfriend, but finding herself frustrated with the lacking dating pool and elusive conversation.

In 2004 Solent Peoples Theatre (UK) adapted the format to create an activity for political representatives to consult with their constituents. A large number of UK local authorities now regularly hold Political Speed Dating events.

A 2002 episode of the Australian comedy series Kath and Kim, where Kim, estranged from her husband of 2 months, goes with her obese ugly friend Sharon to a Speed Dating event. However, all the girls there are overshadowed by Sharon due to her phenomenal knowledge of Cricket.

This episode of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy featured a straight man that the Fab 5 made over to become worthy enough to pick up at a HurryDate brand speed dating party.

External links

See also

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